i am deeply suspicious of a movie title that does not include conjunctions or prepositions. it was right then that i should have let good sense prevail and not watch this turd of a chick film.
however, poor decision making has been the hallmark of my existence for a while now and so, i put my brain through several breakdowns in a span of 90 minutes- the runtime of vcb.
the story of two american girls and their perceptions on relationships undergoing an overhaul in the course of a summer in spain could have been more exciting if:
a. i wasn't a girl who has overheard and had far more interesting conversations on the same subject.
b. if javier barden didn't look like his mother delivered him in a vat of cough syrup, thus giving him this permanently dopey look.
c. it wasn't directed by hollywood's very own humbert humbert who actually got his lolita and thus, feels the need to create movies to cater to the intelligence of a 14-year old.
some horse faced chick plays vicky while we have scarlett "hourglass" johannsson playing cristina. barcelona is played by barcelona itself. javier barden plays the cunt magnet while penelope cruz in her oscar-winning crazy role plays maria elena.
good things about the movie? the end because you can get back to doing more fun things like playing solitaire.
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Macchan, macchan, macchan ne...
Rajnikanth is one of the greatest common denominators of pucca Southies all around the World. You're a qualified southie if you like Rajnikanth. You're not Southie if you don't.
History textbooks will speak of Shivaji Rao Gaekwad's invasion of Tamil Nadu as more potent than any previous Maratha invasion. He's got the charm, the grace and that spark to tap into the pulse the tamil speaking conscience which Chhatrapati Shivaji didn't possess.
I digress, though. My intention is not to carry forward further information on Indian Journalism's topic du jour.
Sivaji is an IT hotshot who has returned from the 'States to do his bit of Corporate Social Responsibility and the not so noble intention of producing spawn to add to the already burgeoning population of the Indian subcontinent.
Noble intentions (CSR) are thwarted by red-tape system and Iyengar named Adiseshan. There comes a point where our hero is penniless but strikes back at Adi by playing his own game. Having accomplished his main mission, he goes on to save all of Tamil Nadu and in the meantime, marry the woman of his dreams.
Moral of the story: Micro finance is going to put India in the G-10 by 2015.
Sivaji's Production Values were what left me screaming for more. In order of what impressed the most- gorgeous camera work, slick action sequences, superb makeup (let's face it, the 58 year old Rajnikanth shed about 20 years. Easy.), brilliant dialogues (execution was wonderful- kudos to all the actors, not one of them was shoddy.), good clothes (I think this is possibly the best that the Tamil entertainment industry has seen by far. Out of a period movie, that is. Naturally, there were glitches including this unforgivable one where the lead actress' boring beige underwear was showing when it shouldn't have.), lovely background score (the songs were just okay, dances didn't excite.)
High points of the movie: Rajnikanth-Vivek chemistry. Rajnikanth and clan pataoing Tamizhselvi (Shriya). Rajnikanth. Move over, Superman, Batman and Robin Hood.
History textbooks will speak of Shivaji Rao Gaekwad's invasion of Tamil Nadu as more potent than any previous Maratha invasion. He's got the charm, the grace and that spark to tap into the pulse the tamil speaking conscience which Chhatrapati Shivaji didn't possess.
I digress, though. My intention is not to carry forward further information on Indian Journalism's topic du jour.
Sivaji is an IT hotshot who has returned from the 'States to do his bit of Corporate Social Responsibility and the not so noble intention of producing spawn to add to the already burgeoning population of the Indian subcontinent.
Noble intentions (CSR) are thwarted by red-tape system and Iyengar named Adiseshan. There comes a point where our hero is penniless but strikes back at Adi by playing his own game. Having accomplished his main mission, he goes on to save all of Tamil Nadu and in the meantime, marry the woman of his dreams.
Moral of the story: Micro finance is going to put India in the G-10 by 2015.
Sivaji's Production Values were what left me screaming for more. In order of what impressed the most- gorgeous camera work, slick action sequences, superb makeup (let's face it, the 58 year old Rajnikanth shed about 20 years. Easy.), brilliant dialogues (execution was wonderful- kudos to all the actors, not one of them was shoddy.), good clothes (I think this is possibly the best that the Tamil entertainment industry has seen by far. Out of a period movie, that is. Naturally, there were glitches including this unforgivable one where the lead actress' boring beige underwear was showing when it shouldn't have.), lovely background score (the songs were just okay, dances didn't excite.)
High points of the movie: Rajnikanth-Vivek chemistry. Rajnikanth and clan pataoing Tamizhselvi (Shriya). Rajnikanth. Move over, Superman, Batman and Robin Hood.
Thursday, March 1, 2007
addendum to art fart.
this is going to be a narrative either at the beginning or the end of "city of joys", my latest apocryphal art project...
roland joffe missed an 's' at the end of 'city of joy'. i mean, joy can't be a unique factor in any city, let alone kolkata.
it is a city that is abound with joys. small joys, big joys. simple joys, fancy joys. uptown joys, downtown joys. legitimate joys, bastard joys. morning joys, night joys. straight joys, gay joys.
joy cometh in the morning. or so thinks wodehouse. joys can cometh when they are sufficiently aroused. sexually, i mean.
joy isn't simply an emotion in kolkata. joy is very likely your next door neighbour.
joy is joyonto.
roland joffe missed an 's' at the end of 'city of joy'. i mean, joy can't be a unique factor in any city, let alone kolkata.
it is a city that is abound with joys. small joys, big joys. simple joys, fancy joys. uptown joys, downtown joys. legitimate joys, bastard joys. morning joys, night joys. straight joys, gay joys.
joy cometh in the morning. or so thinks wodehouse. joys can cometh when they are sufficiently aroused. sexually, i mean.
joy isn't simply an emotion in kolkata. joy is very likely your next door neighbour.
joy is joyonto.
art fart
there is roland joffe's "city of joy". fortunately or unfortunately, this celluloid um... work has remained just a name to me and yet, it gave me inspiration and much er... joy on an idle wednesday morning.
joyonto or joyanta is a fairly common bengali name.
those who can see what i'm getting at can shut their traps and get the godsfuck out of here before you are tempted to question my intelligence or my sanity. for those who don't, here's the blueprint...
these hm... species are called "joy" for short. and there's easily a million of them in kolkata. imagine getting at least 20% of them to congregate in several well-known locations in kolkata thru' the viral sms thing. get a decent enough camera- nothing fancy, just a handycam. script is one simple line- "hi, i'm joy". no acting required. no makeup. no leading woman. sharp editing topped off with a decent enough music score (say, durga pooja music- "joyo, joyo he mahishasura moddhini, etc.)
best short action film at the oscars' is mine next year.
next post: what i'll wear to the oscars'.
joyonto or joyanta is a fairly common bengali name.
those who can see what i'm getting at can shut their traps and get the godsfuck out of here before you are tempted to question my intelligence or my sanity. for those who don't, here's the blueprint...
these hm... species are called "joy" for short. and there's easily a million of them in kolkata. imagine getting at least 20% of them to congregate in several well-known locations in kolkata thru' the viral sms thing. get a decent enough camera- nothing fancy, just a handycam. script is one simple line- "hi, i'm joy". no acting required. no makeup. no leading woman. sharp editing topped off with a decent enough music score (say, durga pooja music- "joyo, joyo he mahishasura moddhini, etc.)
best short action film at the oscars' is mine next year.
next post: what i'll wear to the oscars'.
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